An activist friend and I were chatting the other day. They expressed having a difficult time, and that they were trying not to slip into despair and to do something, but that it's also difficult when so many actions often feel so futile.

I wrote what follows to them, and they said they wanted to write it down to keep it as a present, in their face reminder, so I thought I would write it out for them and then print it for them as a zine. Maybe it will be helpful for some of you who are activists, as well. You all carry so much weight that is not yours to carry.

The following is what I wrote, with minor edits:

Just remember a couple things when you're not sure what to do, and you're kind of feeling the tug toward despair, because that gets to us all who feel the responsibility toward action and activism.

Thoreau, as silly as he was, said something in Civil Disobedience that sticks with me– he says that a person mustn't do everything, but they must do something. But it works both ways. Because you can't do everything. It's not all on you, and you can't set yourself on fire to keep others warm. You can't be everywhere at once and you don't hold the power to make all the change. You can only do what is in front of you, what is within your power, and you can't hold yourself responsible for what is out of your power.

And you do this. Early in my humanitarian career, one of the guys told me, after I was making myself sick with desperation because there was nothing in my power and I had done all that I can do. He said that hope can sometimes be a course of action. When you've done everything you can, and that's all you can do, you can rest with peace in hope until another course of action presents itself.

This meant that at the end of any day, despite often being surrounded by death and destruction, I could tell myself, as long as no one died or suffered due to my actions, it was a good day. If I had done my part, I wouldn't hold the weight of all of what surrounded me. I couldn't.

I'm not saying it's easy. There's a reason I still have cPTSD from my work. But it's true. It's not fair to carry the weight. It's not fair to you, but it's also not fair to the reality of the situation, which is that there are people upon which that weight rightfully sits, and you don't help anyone by carrying the weight that rightfully should be carried by the oppressors.

And the other thing that helps to remember is that the oppression of Palestinians, for example, is part of a vast web of oppression, of pain and control, that has been woven over vast distances and time, woven with the oppression of all oppressed people, and by pulling at this web anywhere helps untangle the thread everywhere. So, when you can't help the Palestinians, by doing work for women, for people of color, for trans people, for anyone and anything, you're still contributing to the same work against the same people and forces who seek to dominate, destroy, and consume others for their own ends.

I know you know all of this stuff. But just a reminder. Because you're awesome. And you deserve to hear it again and to not feel like shit or the despair when you already max yourself out. Not telling you to do less. Just, don't let the guilt get to you. The guilt doesn't serve anything. <3 [A mutual friend] actually had to remind me of that last bit a few days ago.

no ends, only means